Tag: journal

friday’s “secret” – being grateful = being happy

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In my “pursuit of happiness” journey, I have discovered and/or epiphanized (I know, it’s not a word but I like it) a few things.  One, I must define “happiness” for myself; no one can define it for me.  Two, my definition will not be the same as another person’s definition, and that is okay.  And three, my personal definition of happiness includes peace and contentment. I do not always have to feel joy to consider myself happy.

One of the quickest ways for me to get to peace and contentment is for me to feel gratitude and thankfulness. It is another “secret” to happiness.  And as we are in the  season of Thanksgiving, I thought I would take a moment a share some (there is no way that I could list them all; the post would go on forever) of the things that I am grateful for:

  • I am grateful for a wonderful husband who is beyond 100% supportive of my efforts to discover and pursue what I was born to do.  Right now, we do not have a lot of money and Ramen and spaghetti are fast becoming dietary staples, but he does not complain. He is absolutely, totally awesome!
  • I am grateful for my mommy, daddy, and sister who step in all of the time and give us a break from that Ramen and spaghetti.  They are 100% supportive of my pursuing my dreams and help out in all kinds of ways: financially, emotionally, mentally, spiritually.  I could NOT do this without them.
  • I am grateful for my friends and family who are supportive; each in their own way.  I believe I heard Oprah say that you need different friends for different things and I am glad God has brought these different kinds of people into my life to help me and to inspire me:Cheri, Mel, Jamila, Joy, Ms. Griffin, Marian, Erica, Dr. Mc, Katie, Jessica and Vince, Marilyn, Mark, Marjie, Lucas…
  • I am grateful for my little min pin, Bimmer [BEAM-er] who is by my side everyday I am in the office working on this thing I call my life.
  • I am grateful for the book “The Happiness Project” by Gretchen Rubin that inspired me to pursue happiness in such systematic, almost academic, way. Some have said that this concept is an oxymoron.  But it works for her and it works for me.
  • And finally,  I am grateful to all of you who read my musings and my rantings, also known as my thoughts.  I hope that in some teeny, tiny way, my writing about my experience is helping you on your journey.

My challenge is this: to remember that being grateful equals being happy.  And when I am feeling some kind of way about my life, I need to stop and think of what I am grateful for. I read this quote yesterday I was struck by the truth of it, in my life.

“Given the amount of unjust suffering and unhappiness in the world, I am deeply grateful for, sometimes even perplexed by, how much misery I have been spared.” – Dennis Prager

enjoy life…and Happy Thanksgiving!

are you comfortable being…

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I can trace the beginning of my conscience journey to discover happiness to the Jockey ad pictured below that I saw in a fitness magazine over ten years ago.

are you comfortable being…

For some reason the ad spoke to me even though at first glance, it doesn’t seem to make any sense. I mean, she is sitting in the middle of  what appears to be a forest, in a nightgown!  Really? Why is she sitting there?  Is she waiting for someone?  What is she looking at?  Where is the rest of this picture to tell me what she is doing there? My mind, which I sometimes refer to as “neurotic”, darted here and there searching for the who, when, what, and why?

Then I considered the caption:  “are you comfortable being…”  And away my mind when again: comfortable being what? A teacher? Comfortable being why? My underwear fits? I could only assume; it was an ad for Jockey.

But then I thought about how she is just sitting there, in the strangest of places, with no shoes appearing quite contented and comfortable and I considered the caption without the ellipses and posed it as a question: “are you comfortable being? And that thought was the catalyst that made me realize that some things needed to change because I could not answer “yes.”  I was not comfortable being.

I was uncomfortable being. I had a different guy and I knew it wasn’t going to work out but I wasn’t changing it. I had  a job that I had once enjoyed but it was fast becoming mundane and boring.  I didn’t do anything for fun; I didn’t really know what was fun for me. So, I set out on the journey to be “comfortable being.”

Years later, with a wonderful husband, a new career track doing what I am passionate about, a knowledge of some things that I find enjoyable, and a foot solidly in my thirties (which in all honestly could be the real reason for the improvement), I am more comfortable with myself and who I am.  Sure, there are things that I want to work on and continue to improve but I am getting there.  But the change began with the question. Are you comfortable being? Let me know in the comments/replies below.

enjoy life…

friday’s “secret” –

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I have been thinking long and hard about what “secret” I could post about today and nothing profound has come into my mind.  Not to say that everything that has graced these digital pages has been profound but I thought some of it was a little interesting.

But, I have been reading a lot, and I mean A LOT, these past two weeks.  I have been exposed to two new authors (one digitally and one I met in person) and so far I have enjoyed what they have written.  Which got me to thinking on two points: (1) I really LOVE to read and (2) why don’t I do it more often?

When I was a child, a tween, and a teen, I loved to read.  I read every moment I could spare.  I would even go into the bathroom, turn on the fan and pretend I was handling personal business so I wouldn’t be disturbed.  I think my family knew what I was doing most of the time because after a while, it did not work as well as I wanted it to and my mom would tell me to “stop reading and get out of the bathroom.”

Then I went to college and studied English.  There was a lot, and I mean A LOT, of reading involved and honestly, I was sick of it by the time I graduated.  I didn’t want to see another novel, story, essay, etc.  But when I think back on that period of time, I realize I was still reading, just not books.  I started loving magazines. It was quicker and easier to get info and I enjoyed looking at the pictures.

Now, I guess, I have come full circle and I am into anything: books, blogs, magazine articles either digital or the good old kind that require you to physically turn the page.  And for some reason, rediscovery of this old joy, that never fully went away but that has been awakened anew is making me happy.  My to read list is long on Goodreads.com.  And I am happily thinking about the many hours of reading material that I have ahead of me.

I guess then that Friday’s “Secret”  is this: Remember what you loved to do as a child, and find ways to do it again.  Work puzzles, make model planes, color in coloring books with Crayola crayons, take photos, whatever it is, no matter how silly it may appear to us, do it. Hey after all, you might enjoy it and then you will…

enjoy life…