friday’s “secret”: intend to remove things

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One thing that I have discovered about myself over the last few years on my journey to “comfortable being”, is that I absolutely dislike, maybe even hate, spending an exorbitant amount of time taking care of inanimate objects. I don’t want to spend hours cleaning my house – thus, my home is only 1400 square feet. I don’t have a lot of knick-knacks on my shelves because I do not want to to dust them. I cut my hair because I disliked spending hours doing it every week. I personally believe that “the more possessions you own, the more your possessions own you.” There so many other things I’d rather be doing that would make me so much happier.

So, 2016 is the year that I commit to my version of a minimal lifestyle: if it is not useful, beautiful, or loved, it’s out of here! Thus, one of my Intentions for 2016 is to “remove anything from my life that is not useful, beautiful, or loved.” And I am focusing on my stuff during these weary dreary winter months and into the traditional time of spring cleaning.

People generally describe me as a “neat” person; I would describe myself as “neat-ish”. Mommy ingrained in me the habit of making my bed every day (Thanks, Mom!) and I generally put most things away by the end of the day. But I know where the bodies are buried: the desk top that covers the mail and receipts that I haven’t dealt with in a week or more; the closet full of boxes that contain papers that need to be sorted, filed, or trashed; the clothes in the closet that I can’t fit into any more, or can I? All of this weighs on my all ready busy mind. As William James has so famously stated: “Nothing [is] so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an incomplete task.”

Kondo's The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying UpLast year, I read The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondō, a Japanese organizing consultant and author. I have read a number of organization books and articles in the past and have even done wardrobe and closet consultations in another life – pre-Buddy Man. What appealed to me specifically about Kondō’s book was her claim that using her method, the KonMari method of tidying, none of her clients have ever reverted back to their untidy selves. “Yeah, right” was my immediate reaction. I have organized before, many times in fact, but have always discovered that I have to do it again within a few months. This year, I am committed to doing it her way and seeing what happens. I plan on sharing my journey with you; you guys will keep me accountable!

Marie’s first step, before you throw anything out, is to visualize and describe the life that you want to have and what you want to feel in your home. Well, as I stated before, I don’t want to spend time dealing with my stuff; I want to spend my time being a good mom to the Buddy Man, cooking wonderful meals, reading, writing, and running. I want my home to be a source of nourishment for me and my family; a place to rest and to prepare for our lives outside of the house. I want to feel tranquil in my home, everything having a place and everything in its place and my knowing where that place is would be awesome as well!

Over the next few months, I will share my process, my observations, my successes, and my setbacks. So, let’s begin.

Has anyone read the book? Have you tried her methods or any methods to stay organized? Tell me about it.

enjoy life…

quick lit – next page, please {january 2016}

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For those who are new to the blog, and we have quite a number of new readers (Yay!), every Friday, I like to post Friday’s “Secret” to enjoying life. But today, Friday’s “Secret” is being preempted by this month’s Quick Lit post. I am thrilled, once again, to be linking up with Anne Bogel of Modern Mrs. Darcy to share what I have been reading this month.

Last month was a little sparce. The only books that I completed were the books that I was reading to Buddy Man. Thank you for the suggestions of new story board books for him. Please keep those suggestions coming.

Like last year, I have set a reading goal for 2016. I would like to read 36 books this year, which amounts to 3 books a month or 1 book every 10 days. This, I believe, is doable for me; especially if I can stay off Netflix and Amazon Prime!

I am also participating in the Modern Mrs. Darcy’s 2016 Reading Challenge. There are some very cool categories this year; I am particularly excited about “a book you previously abandoned” and “a book you own but have never read”. You can check out her other categories here.

Read:

  • The Round House by Louise Erdrich: So, last month, I really didn’t have many good things to say about this one. It wasn’t one that I picked for myself; it was a book club selection. However, I must say, that my mood about it has changed and it was a very fine book: insightful, thought-provoking, and on a subject matter, the effects of a sexual crime on a family, particularly, the Native American community, that I previously knew nothing about. When I first started the book, I really liked Erdrich choice of words but as I continued, it became harder to follow. I have figured out why. Erdrich does not apply the use of quotation marks so it was very difficult for me to determine when someone was speaking. That was very annoying to me. Yet, as I continued to read, I began to follow the rhythm a lot better and in the end, I am happy that I read this book and was exposed to Louise Erdrich as an author! I especially enjoyed this turn of phrase: “The thought came again, more insistent, and this time I let it in and reviewed it. I thought this idea through to its conclusion. I stood back from my thought. I watched myself think. The end of thinking occurred.”
  • The Little Paris Bookshop by Nina George: A book about everything to do with books, one of my favorite type of books, this one was written wonderfully. I like to write down thought provoking quotes and beautiful phrases/sentences and this one had so many that it would be impossible to write them all here. So I will have to pick one of my favorites: “Love requires so much courage and so little expectation.”
  • 10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge and Found Self-Help that Actually Works – A True Story by Dan Harris: I was pleasantly surprised at how open and forthcoming Harris was in this memoir. I picked up the book for two reasons: one, in large part, due to a review by Modern Mrs. Darcy and two, the fact that title was very intriguing to me because the voice in my head is always going non-stop as well. In the book, Harris’ discusses his journey into finding and beginning a mindfulness/meditation practice. While his journalistic background was evident (he used a lot of words I know and love but rarely use in every day life but wish that I did) Harris was authentic and humorous! I read this book on the way to our annual family vacation at the beach while riding in the car with my extended family and laughed out loud so many times my dad kept asking me what was so funny. Definitely a contender for my personal Book of the Year! A quote I need to remember: “Make the present moment your friend rather than your enemy. Because many people [including me] live habitually as if the present moment were an obstacle that they need to overcome in order to get to the next moment.”

Currently Reading:

 Paused Reading:

  • Daring Greatly by Brené Brown: Paused this one in December. Will pick back up at some point this year! Still enjoying lighter fare this month.

 As always, don’t forget to stop by the Quick Lit link-up over at Modern Mrs. Darcy and check out other great book recommendations. I am on Goodreads and would love more friends, and again, please keep those story board book recommendations coming for a 15-month-old.

enjoy life…

friday’s “secret”: set a few intentions and achieve them

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Beach Sunrise. My Intentions

This week, I have been reviewing my intentions and highlights from 2015. I hesitate to call anything a goal because I have failed to achieve my goals year after year after year. So I started referring to them most often as “intentions” in 2015 and have had a greater success with that small change. It feels easier to me; less intimidating.

I am happy to say that I was able to accomplish quite a few of my intentions for 2015, my main one being becoming more comfortable with this whole “mommy” thing. Jessica Quirk of What I Wore expresses my sentiments along this line so well in this post: Post Partum Identity Crises. It was a real thing for me last year but I think I might be beginning to see a way clear.

Here are my Intentions for 2016

  • Run 6 races, including the Bridgestreet Half Marathon in April. In order to do this, I am going to have to be in the best shape possible so those foundation habits of eating, sleeping (or trying to with a baby), staying hydrated, and training are going to have to be on point.
  • Read 36 books, one more book more than I read last year. I believe I can do it, if I do not gorge on television and it’s various iterations: Netflix, Amazon Prime, and the oh-so-convenient network apps. It is so easy to fall down those rabbit holes, isn’t it?
  • Which brings me to my next intention, staying out of rabbit holes that do nothing for me. I really want to be intentional about my entertainment choices and only watch things that I find enjoyable and/or useful. I am really looking forward to the encore presentation of BBC, PBS, and Masterpiece’s Special, Sherlock: The Abominable Bride this weekend. I missed the January 1st premier.
  • Write more, which will include posting to the blog weekly. Oh boy! You guys are going to have to hold me to this one. LOL!
  • Remove anything from my life that is not useful, beautiful, or loved. I start with my wardrobe next week and will work my way around the home through these dull winter months. I probably won’t have anything to wear! Eeeek!
  • Give a “durn”! Being a mom, it is super easy to fall into the “oh, why bother” mindset. Buddy Man is just going to mess it up anyway! But I feel so much better when I care. So, more often than not, I want to be put together rather than thrown together. I also think I want to color my new short cut. We will have to see about that though!
  • And finally, being a stay-at-home mom has kind of taken a toll on me, socially. I am very thankful for my family and friends who have kept me sane with their phone calls, opening up their homes, and visits. I want more of those experiences! I want to feel more connected to people, even through digital mediums, this year! For an introvert, that’s saying something!

What are your intentions or goals this year?