Category: Friday’s Secret

friday’s “secret”: intend to remove things

3 Comments

One thing that I have discovered about myself over the last few years on my journey to “comfortable being”, is that I absolutely dislike, maybe even hate, spending an exorbitant amount of time taking care of inanimate objects. I don’t want to spend hours cleaning my house – thus, my home is only 1400 square feet. I don’t have a lot of knick-knacks on my shelves because I do not want to to dust them. I cut my hair because I disliked spending hours doing it every week. I personally believe that “the more possessions you own, the more your possessions own you.” There so many other things I’d rather be doing that would make me so much happier.

So, 2016 is the year that I commit to my version of a minimal lifestyle: if it is not useful, beautiful, or loved, it’s out of here! Thus, one of my Intentions for 2016 is to “remove anything from my life that is not useful, beautiful, or loved.” And I am focusing on my stuff during these weary dreary winter months and into the traditional time of spring cleaning.

People generally describe me as a “neat” person; I would describe myself as “neat-ish”. Mommy ingrained in me the habit of making my bed every day (Thanks, Mom!) and I generally put most things away by the end of the day. But I know where the bodies are buried: the desk top that covers the mail and receipts that I haven’t dealt with in a week or more; the closet full of boxes that contain papers that need to be sorted, filed, or trashed; the clothes in the closet that I can’t fit into any more, or can I? All of this weighs on my all ready busy mind. As William James has so famously stated: “Nothing [is] so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an incomplete task.”

Kondo's The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying UpLast year, I read The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondō, a Japanese organizing consultant and author. I have read a number of organization books and articles in the past and have even done wardrobe and closet consultations in another life – pre-Buddy Man. What appealed to me specifically about Kondō’s book was her claim that using her method, the KonMari method of tidying, none of her clients have ever reverted back to their untidy selves. “Yeah, right” was my immediate reaction. I have organized before, many times in fact, but have always discovered that I have to do it again within a few months. This year, I am committed to doing it her way and seeing what happens. I plan on sharing my journey with you; you guys will keep me accountable!

Marie’s first step, before you throw anything out, is to visualize and describe the life that you want to have and what you want to feel in your home. Well, as I stated before, I don’t want to spend time dealing with my stuff; I want to spend my time being a good mom to the Buddy Man, cooking wonderful meals, reading, writing, and running. I want my home to be a source of nourishment for me and my family; a place to rest and to prepare for our lives outside of the house. I want to feel tranquil in my home, everything having a place and everything in its place and my knowing where that place is would be awesome as well!

Over the next few months, I will share my process, my observations, my successes, and my setbacks. So, let’s begin.

Has anyone read the book? Have you tried her methods or any methods to stay organized? Tell me about it.

enjoy life…

friday’s “secret”: set a few intentions and achieve them

2 Comments

Beach Sunrise. My Intentions

This week, I have been reviewing my intentions and highlights from 2015. I hesitate to call anything a goal because I have failed to achieve my goals year after year after year. So I started referring to them most often as “intentions” in 2015 and have had a greater success with that small change. It feels easier to me; less intimidating.

I am happy to say that I was able to accomplish quite a few of my intentions for 2015, my main one being becoming more comfortable with this whole “mommy” thing. Jessica Quirk of What I Wore expresses my sentiments along this line so well in this post: Post Partum Identity Crises. It was a real thing for me last year but I think I might be beginning to see a way clear.

Here are my Intentions for 2016

  • Run 6 races, including the Bridgestreet Half Marathon in April. In order to do this, I am going to have to be in the best shape possible so those foundation habits of eating, sleeping (or trying to with a baby), staying hydrated, and training are going to have to be on point.
  • Read 36 books, one more book more than I read last year. I believe I can do it, if I do not gorge on television and it’s various iterations: Netflix, Amazon Prime, and the oh-so-convenient network apps. It is so easy to fall down those rabbit holes, isn’t it?
  • Which brings me to my next intention, staying out of rabbit holes that do nothing for me. I really want to be intentional about my entertainment choices and only watch things that I find enjoyable and/or useful. I am really looking forward to the encore presentation of BBC, PBS, and Masterpiece’s Special, Sherlock: The Abominable Bride this weekend. I missed the January 1st premier.
  • Write more, which will include posting to the blog weekly. Oh boy! You guys are going to have to hold me to this one. LOL!
  • Remove anything from my life that is not useful, beautiful, or loved. I start with my wardrobe next week and will work my way around the home through these dull winter months. I probably won’t have anything to wear! Eeeek!
  • Give a “durn”! Being a mom, it is super easy to fall into the “oh, why bother” mindset. Buddy Man is just going to mess it up anyway! But I feel so much better when I care. So, more often than not, I want to be put together rather than thrown together. I also think I want to color my new short cut. We will have to see about that though!
  • And finally, being a stay-at-home mom has kind of taken a toll on me, socially. I am very thankful for my family and friends who have kept me sane with their phone calls, opening up their homes, and visits. I want more of those experiences! I want to feel more connected to people, even through digital mediums, this year! For an introvert, that’s saying something!

What are your intentions or goals this year?

friday’s “secret”: create your best, of the year {2015 edition}

10 Comments

I cannot believe that the year is pretty much over! Two more weeks and I will be telling you “Happy New Year!” As Gretchen Rubin has so eloquently stated, “The days are long but the years are short” and seem to get shorter and shorter with each passing year!

One fun thing to do at the end of the year is to look back over it and think about my highlights: what I did that was fun and memorable. I have had a great year and there is so much I could write about. But this is my “best, of the year” list, so only the best here.

Quote of the Year: Honor the space between no longer and not yet! – Nancy Levin

Pic. Better Than BeforeBook of the Year: So many books, it is so hard to pick just one. But here goes: Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin – finding the Four Tendency Framework and discovering that I am an Obliger has literally changed my life and how I go about accomplishing things that I want to do. It is now available in a paperback edition here.

Race of the Year: I only entered two races this year so not many to chose from but between the two: The 12th Annual Liz Hurley Run and the 2015 Galaxy of Lights 5K, I would have to chose the Galaxy of Lights. At that race, I ran in spite of fear and anytime I do something in spite of fear it is one of my highlights!

The Wynn Las VegasMeal of the Year: A foodie like me cannot not tell you about the best food of the year; so many options here. But I will have to go with breakfast at the Wynn Buffet in Las Vegas. This is where my hubby and I held our wedding brunch almost 10 years ago and every time I get to eat there is an awesome thing. Another thing that I loved about this meal was that I didn’t pig out, even though I wanted to. A moral victory for me!

Blog of the Year: I’m sorry but I can’t pick just one so this category will have two blogs of the year. One is Modern Mrs. Darcy which I have mentioned over and over again. The second one is The Geeky Shopaholic which I have discovered just recently. I love her content.

Podcast of the Year: I devoured everything Elizabeth Gilbert this year. Her podcast Magic Lessons was the impetus that caused me to continue to put my work out into the world, regardless of my fear. Based on her book, Big Magic (see how I edged another book in there?) one of the things that will always stick with me is that fear will always be present, in my car, as I travel on this journey of life. The only thing is, he is not allowed to dictate my destination or to control the radio under any circumstances.

Trip of the Year: Even though I went to the beach three times and a family reunion in Vegas, my best travel experience was my sister’s wedding in St. Augustine, Florida! The entire weekend was full: full of joy, full of excitement, full of family and friends, full of fun. Over all, that will always take the cake.

Movie of the Year: So many of my favorite franchises released movies this year: Marvel, The Fast and the Furious, etc. But the winner in this category, and I really can’t believe I am saying this, is Disney-Pixar’s Inside Out. It was awesome!

Like Mother, Like SonInstagram of the Year: “Like mother, like son!” Slowly, ever so slowly adjusting to being a new mom was a huge part of this year and having a child is scary. One of the scariest things about it is seeing yourself in your child’s face and in his personality. I dare you to tell me, which one is the Buddy Man.

Many thanks to Paula of the Geeky Shopaholic for the idea for this post. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

enjoy life…